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Does Vanity Fair even know it has a heterosexual male readership? Does it care?

Drogba Ronaldo
It’s one of the finest monthly magazines in the English language. Certainly, it’s the only one to keep me occupied through return transatlantic flights. But even at the best of times, I doubt many straight men would feel 100% comfortable being seen reading Vanity Fair in public. It doesn’t matter how mature, well adjusted and secure in your own masculinity you are. Sooner or later you’re going to find yourself weighing the quality of the journalism against how gay the cover is likely to make you look on the Luas. The recent Gordon Gecko one won’t have have offended any macho sensibilities. But that was a rare exception. (To find another, you would have to go all the way back to James Gandolfini in March 2007.)

Last month’s Grace Kelly cover was much more representative. “How a Philadelphia dreamer became a princess,” read the headline “and why her classic style still inspires.” I’m sure I wasn’t the only reader to wince slightly as the cashier handed back the change.

Clearly then, the magazine’s editors aren’t too concerned about pandering to a straight male audience when selecting their covers. And that’s fine. It’s their prerogative. But even so they’d outdone themselves this time! Seriously, who decides to publish an article as fascinating as this in the pages of an magazine with a cover as tacky as this? I mean, what… the… fuck?

May 11th, 2010.

17 Responses to “Does Vanity Fair even know it has a heterosexual male readership? Does it care?”

  1. Fintan Says:

    I wouldn’t say their covers ever bothered me before. But yeah definitely can’t see myself purchasing this one.

  2. Rob Says:

    I pick Vanity Fair up whenever i’ve got a plane/train journey ahead of me and always get looks of confusion from friends. For example, last year when I was going on holiday with a group of friends I picked this fairly solid issue up to much derision – http://www.denimology.com/2009/07/heath-ledger-vanity-fair-denim-jeans-JT-1.jpg – only for most of them (male and female) to end up giving it a read at some point over the next couple of weeks. I really think they let themselves down with their covers and that’s what’s led to the content being misinterpreted.
    No chance I’ll be buying this one with those two pricks on the cover though.

  3. Roisin Says:

    Ah Jesus, don’t be so sensitive! They’ve had plenty of scantily clad women on the cover too.

  4. Eoin Says:

    @ Roisin – I suppose my point is that it’s annoying that a magazine with such broad appeal invariably selects covers on the basis of their appeal to only one demographic.

    It’s true they’ve had scantily clad women on the cover. But even those don’t exactly contradict what I’m saying, do they?

    http://www.karinandraoul.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/gisele-bundchen-vanity-fair-may-2009-magazine-cover.jpg

  5. damien Says:

    Dude, I know exactly what you mean. I buy the mag nearly every month, love reading Hitchen etc. My friends are always asking why I reading womens magazines but that okay. I’m not that insecure. But Jesus there is no way I’m buying that.

  6. brendan Says:

    @Rob”No chance I’ll be buying this one with those two pricks on the cover though…”

    You don’t know that for sure
    http://www.cracked.com/article_14811_do-it-yourself-crotch-bulges.html

  7. Chucho Flores Says:

    I actually found the article to be terribly dull. Hitchens and Amis never seem to tire of spinning the same old self-dramatising tales about the London literary scene.

    Agreed on the covers though.

  8. p.mangalore Says:

    The old boy’s imitation of an angry dog barking the words “fuck off” was note-perfect.
    cucho:self-dramatising!!!!go away to mogadishu for yourself boy!legend!self-dramatising?ah no.
    these yokes are md googlewhacks : and this ; and this !
    billy idol-cat!

  9. Eoin Says:

    Welcome back Dan, I was starting to get worried!

  10. Rob Says:

    Eoin, any chance of a new blog post? I’m sick of coming on here and being greeted by those two chumps.

  11. Alan Says:

    The old boy’s imitation of an angry dog barking the words “fuck off” was note-perfect.
    mogadishu???give me a break.

  12. p.mangalore Says:

    whatyer gosh!

    guy from france ferdinand is on thr radio
    im not going to be so defferential now tho.
    isn e sin e j’accuse freaks and geeks!
    its not the point that i explain myself to everyone im not addressing everyone arrow?
    t’arrows a bumnote.
    pathos a woman is saying shes sad.
    cut
    throw a bucket of water at her face
    cut.thats bathos baby!

    ipad polish lotto builders mister tet!
    and you sean moncrief!
    i should cast you as a nazi a navi nazi!

    pmangalore is a guy in a novel my chum gave me and ta go leor fear ann,nil tada nios measa na bud ina sheasamh.it takes balls baby!
    like a onld man barking fuckl off
    that line is so good because its the kinda shit kinglu was coming out with and hitchens had it in a foreward of an kinglsley amis i read in ohmahonys out the front like i was steven fry only thats the mahonys in town where you can see out onto the castle street.a little folded up tissue peper the size of a comb with a little adams on it.a glenryan well call it ping! here i combnine the langham with the vladamir cheek cheek of your arse.all the good people know you know yourself.
    the self-mythologising bit was just to flutser chupa me lay poya you and have you think-self-mythologizing was i right about that?ok cupid?the mar dhea googlewhacks that was to be nice and pretend i didnt know the diff between ;: i of couurse do a few years in the cbs tou woukkldnt be long finding that out.http://i.thestreet.com/files/tsc/mainstreet-photos/misc/bracco.jpg
    thats a nod yo bb who said he got a fright one time seeing two arabs silently fighting each other on the streets of paris knifingeach other goodo.that little bollocks from avaatr showed up in my aqueous humer one time.and billy idol-cat is billy idol in the doors which was on tg4 the last night and was a super picture by all accounts.
    so now so.htbwrdlsly.
    a thuile.ledgend i only have to type e.
    ill be at tommyt’ t(better not be shiting his head off thats about all ill say,a hangunder poor flann never gets a fair crack of the whip) and not a word of irish then mar dora marr y dave od this week.macsavage in trajed jah [email protected] following stevie wonder on twittera long comment but then i used all the letters of the alphabet..ill end in a w how w dontw know

  13. Conal Says:

    be the jaysus.

    is this what Ulysses is like?

  14. David Says:

    I agree with Rob’s post. Does Eoin Butler even know that he has a heterosexual male readership? Does he care??

  15. Rob Says:

    @David – clearly not, the bollox.

  16. Andrew Says:

    When I first saw that cover in a shop my immediate thought was “Jesus, they sell the Gay Times in Fresh now?”
    Like everyone else here, there’s just no fucking way I’d dream of reading that in public. Mind you, I don’t read magazines with scantily-clad women on the cover either. I save those for home.
    Also, now that i’m examining the image a little closer, Ronaldo does not appear to be particularly well-equipped at all. You can oil up those abs all you like boy, you’re fucked now.

  17. brendan Says:

    What I don’t understand is how these don’t get more flack from rival fans over this. I’m not saying there should be more homophobic taunting I’m just surprised.

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