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SHINE BLOCKAS (2009)

Now strictly speaking, I think Pitchfork are a bunch of joyless, socially inadequate anoraks whose ongoing willingness to disseminate their own brattish opinions on music remains a damning incitement of the socio-behavioral utility of whatever bullies they went to school with. That’s strictly speaking. Read the rest of this entry »

NEW ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING (CONTD.)

Okay, you’ve never witnessed another person defecate up close and you don’t want to hear about it either? That’s understandable. I can respect that. But I will say this: Play-Doh Fun Factory. Ha ha. Ruined your lunchtime, did I? Oh, I’m sorry… Welcome to my world motherfuckers. Read the rest of this entry »

I’VE GOT SOUP, BUT I’M NOT A SUPERVISOR. I’VE GOT SOUP, BUT I’M NOT A SUPERVISOR. I’VE GOT SOUP, BUT I’M NOT A SUPERVISOR.

THIS IS FUNNY

What’s the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Read the rest of this entry »

“SINCE THEN EOIN’S LIFE HAS SPIRALLED INTO A HAZE OF HILARITY AND ADVENTURE…”

Not the first time I’ve posted this by any means. But it’s funny, so who cares. This is a wildly inaccurate profile of me done by a student paper in DCU in 2005. The interview really did take place. However, I dunno whether the guy’s Dictaphone malfunctioned, or if he suffered some sort of hallucinogen-induced flashback during the transcription process, but none of the quotations attributed to me are even remotely accurate. Read the rest of this entry »

JE VOUS PRESENTE… LE CHRISTMAS JUMPER

Fashion, for most Irish men, is a song we heard once, whose tune we half-remember and whose words we never knew… Read the rest of this article here.

@ABANDONEDTWEETDEPOSITORY

Day Three of my personal Twitter revolution and – aside from a few blog updates, which are posted automatically – I remain pretty much a Tweet virgin. Its just not happening I’m afraid. My main problem is that I don’t have any thoughts profound enough that I want to share them with the world, but also concise enough that I can express them in 140 characters.

Nonetheless I have had thoughts over the course of the day. Musings even. Some of them even borderline insightful. But none quite Tweet-worthy. Here, if you’re interested, are my not quite Tweet-worthy Tweets. Read the rest of this entry »

THIS IS FUNNY

A neutron walks into a bar, orders a pint of Smithwicks and asks, “How much?” Read the rest of this entry »

THE DEVIL MADE ME DO IT THE FIRST TIME

It’s isn’t always easy to pinpoint the moment a session turns into a bender. The American writer P.J. O’Rourke reckons its when he finds himself carrying a drink (“a real drink, with ice cubes in a cocktail glass”) with him wherever he goes – to the bank, the supermarket or even into the shower. Read the rest of this entry »

MUST BE SANTA (2009)

Not the first (or second) time I’ve posted this video but, fuck, this is just so insanely brilliant I just gotta give it another spin. The guys who made it are geniuses.