ireland

“As much of an enigma, at the end of it all, as he was at the beginning…”

I went on the radio Tuesday night talking about my trip to Cameroon with Benoit Assou-Ekotto and Sightsavers. The recording is here…

Published: Irish Independent, 4 May 2013

Should we trust TripAdvisor?

Susan O’Donoghue did not sleep well at Lynam’s Hotel in Dublin. “I kept waking up in the middle of the night,” she recalls. “And scratching myself. In the morning I was covered in bites. I don’t know if you’ve ever had bed bugs, Eoin, but they’re 10 times worse than mosquitoes. I was itching for weeks.”

A few days later, the hotel’s general manager responded to Susan’s complaints via email, seeming to acknowledge the existence of a problem.

“Unfortunately they [bed bugs] have become a major problem throughout European and US hotels in recent years,” he wrote, “and we look to have fallen victim to them.” Read the rest of this entry »

Published: The Global Mail, October 2012

‘Once upon a time in the West…’

One positive legacy of Ireland’s late, ill-fated economic boom is a dramatically expanded motorway network. Spilling out from Dublin, to a half dozen towns and cities on the southern and western seaboard, these pristine highways have slashed journey times to and from the capital, effectively shrinking the island.

Take a detour cross-country, though, and the pace of life remains less than hectic. It’s 10am in the sleepy Co. Galway village of Dunmore and I’ve run into a brick wall. Or to be precise, a horse’s arse. A horse trailer, towed by an elderly farmer, has reduced southbound traffic on the R328 to a leisurely 45kph.

In another setting, one might honk the horn and demand that the driver give way. But this is the west of Ireland, where just about anyone could turn out to be your cousin, long lost uncle or grandmother’s yoga instructor. So it pays not to be too demonstrative. Read the rest of this entry »

Published: Irish Times, November 1 2011

The art and science of feeling foolish

In the cavernous saloon of the Waldorf Barbershop, Liam Finnegan is leafing through a book entitled The Art and Science of Barbering. It is basically a retro Argos catalogue of facial hair. And he’s pitching me ideas. “The Divided Handlebar?” he offers. “The Modified Handlebar? The Painter’s Brush? The Nightshade?”

The Nightshade looks dangerously close to The Hitler, I suggest. “Oh no, no,” he furrows his brow and flicks forward a few pages until he finds what he is looking for. “That would be The Adolph.” Christ. How old is the book? He shrugs his shoulders. “Old.” Read the rest of this entry »

“I’m not necessarily making the comparison, but don’t Page 3 models usually say the same thing…?”

I’m sure they do and I’m sure they enjoy what they do, otherwise they wouldn’t do it. But their work is primarily oriented to a male audience and it’s done to elicit a sexual response. Burlesque is all about the trimmings, the sets, the costumes, the storyline. It’s about feeling sexy, but also showing the personality behind it.Read the rest of this article here.

Time there, folks, please! Change in the Middle East, have yiz no homes to go to?



“President Hosni Mubarak dashed the hopes of hundreds of thousands of Egyptians waiting for what they thought would be his resignation speech last night by defiantly announcing that he would not bow to domestic or foreign pressure to quit…” Read the rest of this article.

Randomers: an apologia


By throwing-out time on a Friday night, the streets resemble a ripped seam or a Hieronymus Bosch painting come to life. The footpaths teem with swaying bodies and grimacing faces. Some are belligerent. Others are content. Others still are lovelorn. Most are drunk. And some… Well, some of us are peckish since you ask. In the bars and clubs from whence we were ejected, dim lighting encouraged coyness and prevarication. Here however, in the unforgiving glare of the late night florescent chip shop, conversations tend to be blunt and to the point. Read the rest of this entry »

The funniest thing I’ve ever seen.


Let me say this: that boy has no business on the back of that donkey. None whatsoever. At one point – when they both go careering into the bushes – I’m seriously thinking, if this video gets any funnier, I might actually die laughing. (Spoiler alter: it then gets even funnier.)

“You’ve heard of the Loch Ness Monster, right? The fact is that there are dozens of these lake creatures all over the world…”


Since 2008, I’ve been doing a weekly Q&A interview at the front of the Irish Times Saturday Magazine. This is the only one they’ve ever refused to print. I interviewed a preacher who was about to address a creationism rally in Lucan. The Irish Times refused to publish it on the grounds that the guy was nuts. My position was that of course the guy was nuts, that was precisely why I interviewed him in the first place. Sanity prevailed, unfortunately… Read the rest of this article here.

Miscellaneous Amusing Items I Come Across #46


Fame is a fickle mistress, Idris. One moment you’re kingpin of the Barksdale organisation. The next Ray Shah is patting you on the back and offering a few pointers. More here.