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“YOU KNOW THE WAY LIFE ISN’T FAIR, RIGHT?”

My phone is ringing. It’s Aidan. I might have guessed. “You know the way life isn’t fair..?” he asks. As opening gambits go, this is one of his better efforts. (The last time he rang with bad news, he said “You were never too fond of that coffee table, were you?”)

Immediately, my mind races through all sorts of horrific possibilities. Aidan has run over my dog. Aidan has impregnated my sister. Aidan has murdered my pregnant sister and run over my dog while making his getaway… It’s almost a relief when he coughs up the truth. Read the rest of this article.

UP WITH PEOPLE (2000)

I once spent a drunken evening attempting to explain to Kurt Wagner exactly how much I loved this song. In retrospect, I think the man took my point.

ERM… CAN I CALL YOU A TAXI OR ANYTHING?

Published: Irish Times, May 1 2009

FOR MY NEXT TRICK, I WILL POUR BOILING TAR ON LISA HANNIGAN’S HEAD…

IT’S A GORGEOUS Monday afternoon; one of those rare, life-affirming days in the early summer when the world, however fleetingly, appears vibrant, green and new. But at our table in a bustling Italian restaurant on the banks of the Grand Canal, Lisa Hannigan isn’t brimming with the joys of summer just yet. She’s anxious that if she orders food, she may accidentally spill something on her blouse. (There is a photo shoot to follow.) She’s anxious that if she doesn’t eat, the restaurant may want the table back. But for the most part, she’s just anxious about where I might be going with my opening question. Read the rest of this entry »

IF THIS EDITION OF WOMAN’S WAY FLIES OFF THE SHELVES THEN EVERYTHING I KNOW ABOUT THE WOMEN’S PERIODICAL INDUSTRY IS WRONG

THIS IS FUNNY

A penguin walks into a bar, and says to the barman,
“My brother was in here earlier, have you seen him?”

The barman replies, “I don’t know.
What does he look like?”

ROCK AND ROLL (1999)

WORD OF THE DAY: SPELUNKER

spe⋅lunk⋅er  [spi-luhng-ker]
–noun Read the rest of this entry »

TRIPPING ALONG THE LEDGE: AS SEEN ON TV

Tripping Along the Ledge has been A.W.O.L. for the past 24 hours, celebrating Mayo’s heartstopping, last minute victory over Galway in the Connacht football final. Forget Peader Gardiner, how the hell did Ollie score in that hat?

HUSSEIN IN THE MEMBRANE [UPDATED]

Recently, I received an interesting email concerning my interview with Dr Latif Yahia, a.k.a. “Saddam’s son”, the controversial, Irish-based Iraqi exile fêted by RTE, BBC, CNN and Fox News. It comes from his ex-wife. “Hi Eoin, just had a read of your blog – very funny!” she writes. “I read your article with ‘Dr’ Latif Yahia and I’d just like to say fair play to you for seeing right through him. Let me point out a couple of things…” Read the rest of this entry »